No marriage is perfect. All couples are bound to run into relationship problems every now and then. But when we find our soulmate, we would do anything we can to prevent mishaps and misunderstandings from ruining our happy relationship.
Research that has followed couples through happy times and breakups are bringing couples up close with the most common reasons why marriages fail. The most common reason? A lack of communication in relationships.
The good news is that there are steps you can take to strengthen your relationship. The information provided in these studies helps us learn the best ways to maintain a happy, healthy marriage. Here are 5 common relationship mistakes to avoid to keep your marriage in tip-top shape.
Lies spread like wildfire and leave relationship problems in their wake. From little white fibs to straight-up lies about where you’re going and who you’re hanging out with, lying matters.
Building trust is essential for healthy relationships. Your partner needs to know that they can trust you with their most precious secrets as well as their heart.
When there is trust in a relationship your partner will know that:
- You are sexually faithful. When you lie about fidelity, you open your spouse up to the possibility of getting an STD on top of having their heart broken.
- You love them. Part of trust is letting your partner know that you love and care for them and won’t seek to harm or control them.
- You don’t have any ulterior motives.
- You build trust that you will not abandon one another during disagreements or anger.
- Trust that the relationship matters. It is your priority to make your relationship work.
2. Letting Insecurities Ruin a Good Thing
Your past experiences in relationships can have a direct connection to how you treat your spouse.
For example, if a former partner was unfaithful to you, it may bring unwarranted jealousy or distrust into your current relationship. This is unpleasant for both spouses involved. It fills you with needless anxiety and puts your partner in the position of feeling defensive about their every action.
Personal insecurities can cause you to do irrational things like check your partner’s phone without permission or make you feel devastated if your spouse goes anywhere without you.
It’s natural during the honeymoon period of your relationship to feel especially attached to your new beau, but feeling clingy enough that you don’t want your spouse to hang out with their own friends or practice their hobbies can turn toxic quickly.
A negative body image can also have a sad effect on your current relationship.
It’s tough to feel uncomfortable in your own skin. It may cause you to ask for constant reassurance from your partner, which can be draining. Low self-esteem is also shown to have a negative effect on sexual functioning.
Rest assured, your partner loves you for you. They find you attractive both inside and out and can’t wait to jump into bed with you.
3. Poor Communication
Is there anything more important than communication in relationships? We think not.
Communication is your lifeline to your partner. It’s how you will learn to resolve your issues, know one another better and strengthen your marriage.
If you don’t know how to communicate with your sweetheart, your relationship will suffer for it.
Studies reveal that sexual communication is positively associated with both relationship quality and sexual satisfaction.
The bottom line: the better your communication is, the better your sex life will be. If you and your spouse don’t know how to communicate about your needs and desires, your intimacy will suffer.
When it comes to relationships, there seem to be a lot of rules. From not sleeping with your spouse on the first date to waiting two years or more to propose, the list is endless. But one rule you must absolutely follow to avoid relationship problems is to keep your negative thoughts close to the vest.
It can be tempting to tell your bests friends about all the little things your spouse does that irritate you, but this is dangerous for multiple reasons.
For a start, your friends will begin to dislike your partner. While a quick text or call to share an eye roll with your friend about that annoying thing your spouse helped you blow off steam, it was potentially damaging to your partner’s reputation.
Instead of your friends focusing on all of the wonderful qualities in your spouse, they will zero in on that one thing that bugged you.
Revealing your spouse’s secrets or gossiping about an argument you recently had is also damaging to your relationship. Breaking your partner’s trust can be deadly for a relationship.
Once broken, it’s an uphill climb to win back your spouse’s trust.
5. Not Spending Quality Time Together
Maintaining some form of independence is great no matter how long you have been dating. Pursuing your own hobbies and social scene can help you maintain a positive sense of self.
However, relationships suffer when couples don’t make spending time together a priority.
Spending time together as a couple is important for building trust and communication in relationships.
Research shows that lasting relationships have much to do with treating your spouse like your best friend, agreeing on goals and morals, and viewing the relationship as something sacred.
By not spending enough quality time together, you are robbing your relationship of developing on a deeper level. Communication, excitement, and libidos take a nosedive when couples aren’t putting in the effort to spend quality time together and establish a true connection.
Relationship problems come in all shapes and sizes. Complaining, lack of communication, betraying a spouse’s trust, and personal insecurities can eat away at a healthy partnership. By practicing healthy communication in relationships, you’ll be on your way to a happy, healthy marriage in no time.