Getting married to someone is a huge step to take in life. You need to make sure that you’re properly prepared before taking the step to minimize the chances of making a mistake that could be quite a hassle to rectify. There are things that you can do to ensure that you’re properly prepared before getting married though.
Ensure You Are Both Disease Free
Before you get married to someone, it’s important to know that both of you are disease free. If someone has a disease, it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t marry them—it simply means that you have the right to be informed before you walk down the aisle and make a commitment to them.
It’s best to go together to have the testing done so that you can both be sure that the results you get are accurate. If results come back that are not what you expected, take the time to find out if the disease is treatable and what the long-term effects of it are if it’s not. You may still want to be with someone even if they have a disease if it won’t create a risk to your health or longevity.
Living with someone is much different than just dating them. When you’re around them twenty-four hours a day, you may see a side of them that you aren’t used to seeing. There are things that people can hide from you if they aren’t around you all of the time. Drug abuse, for example, can be easy to hide if you aren’t around someone a lot.
Both of you should take a drug test before you get married. This allows you to be sure that you nor your partner are hiding drug use from one another. If your partner fails, places like Better Help Addiction Care can help with regard to addiction treatment and recovery. In order for the care to be as effective as it can be, your partner will actually want to quit using the drugs.
Sit down and have a candid conversation with him or her about their drug use. Let them know that it isn’t something you want in your life and be willing to walk away if they don’t want to stop—it’ll be hard but necessary in the end. If they want help, inpatient or outpatient care may be the best way for them to be able to have long-term sobriety after a drug addiction.
Compare Finances and Debt
Financial stress is a huge factor that plagues many relationships and establishing everything from the start will decrease the chances of you fighting about money later on down the road.
When you get married, one of the worst things you can find out is that the person you’re marrying isn’t responsible with their money. If they are in massive debt and have a hard time paying their bills on time, it could greatly impact the overall happiness of your home.
Talk to your partner about their financial situation before you get married. Find out if they are in debt, what their credit score is, and if they have any money saved up or are living paycheck to paycheck. If you want to have a bright future, you both need to be financially sound.
Establish if you will have a joint or single bank account before you say your vows. You need to know who is responsible for paying which bills and determine who will be responsible for keeping account of everything.
Have a Prenup Created
You need to discuss whether a prenup is important to you or not. If it is, meet with an attorney to have one created. Make sure that it includes all details about what happens if a divorce does take place if alimony will be paid, who gets what, amongst other things.
You want to be sure that you both know and agree to the stipulations with the prenup so that you both have peace of mind going into the marriage that neither of you is out for the other person’s money.
Make Sure You Talk About Kids
If you feel strongly about kids, you need to let your future spouse know. If he or she feels differently about kids than you do, it could create frustration later on down the road. Having kids is a life commitment that needs to be taken seriously and can’t just be decided on a whim.
Be specific about how many kids you want to have if you want to homeschool them and if you want them to be raised in a specific religion. All the factors are crucial to discuss before getting married because if you don’t agree with them, the chances of your marriage surviving will be minimal.
Know Where You Want to Live
Many people assume that the person they’re marrying agrees with them when it comes to the living arrangements, but that isn’t always the case. There are a lot of times where one person assumes that the couple will move into their home, only to have the other person assumes the same.
Talk to your loved one about where you want to live once you’re married. If you can’t agree on either of your homes, you may want to consider getting a new home for the two of you to share together. This allows you to both have a say in every aspect of the house that you will be living in for the next few years.
Properly preparing for marriage can increase the chances of it lasting. It takes the guesswork out of many situations that arise within a marriage and helps you both to stay on the same page to minimize bickering or anyone feeling as though their thoughts and feelings aren’t being taken into consideration. Marriage takes work, but in the end, it’s worth it.