Dating alone has its own highs and lows. It’s challenging enough as it is. Now, dating a transgender, that’s another level of challenge that you probably know nothing about. If you think it’s going to be easy as pie, think again. You may come running out the door with your tail in-between your legs. To all the people out there who choose and continue to choose their transgender partner above all else, I salute you. You are some of the bravest fellows I know.
Thing is, love is hard – for literally everyone. Ask a couple who’ve been together for 2 years and they’d tell you it has been a wild ride. Ask a couple who’ve been together for 2 decades and they’d tell you the exact same thing. Love is experienced in various ways but the bottom line is that it’s not going to be easy (check this). No matter what form of love you experience, you will come across your own set of difficulties. The ability to go above and beyond these tests and trials is what makes your courage. It’s what makes love all the more worth experiencing.
If you’re willing to give love a chance despite all its downsides, then that alone makes you special. It makes you worthy of loving people who are difficult to love – say transmen and transwomen.
But why am I saying this? Why do I keep saying that loving a transgender is going to be a difficult path to take? Well, let me explain why.
Why Is It Hard To Date A Transgender?
Before you start going into ladyboy dating websites, you should understand that there are many factors that contribute to the big challenge of dating a transgender. But I guess that at the end of the day, we can sum it up into just three major things:
Most Transgender Individuals Lack Self-Confidence
Self-confidence isn’t something you can gain with a flick of a finger. In fact, someone can’t gain it just because people tell them to. So saying things like “You should be more confident in yourself” or “You should really grow some confidence” is not going to help someone feel better about themselves – more so if this certain “someone” is battling gender identity issues.
What we have to understand is that transgender people have decided to undergo a sex reassignment procedure because they feel trapped in their own bodies. They feel dysphoria, gender dysphoria to be specific, and they find it very uncomfortable to be living in the body of the wrong sex. So as you may already guess, self-confidence is the last thing they’d think of if they have a problem with their identity as an individual. They are constantly torn between wanting to love themselves and not being able to. It’s a challenge most people who fall in either one of the binary sexes cannot even empathize with.
If you think that you are meant to go out with a transgender and spark a romantic connection with them, you may find it hard to make them believe in themselves. It may not seem like it at first but loving someone with little to no confidence can be terribly stressful. And if you’re counting on the possibility that you can change them, then you just better keep on counting because it’s not going to be that easy. Read about a similar topic here: https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/2018/12/10/what-its-like-date-transgender-woman/.
Many Transgender Individuals Find It Hard to Accept the Fact That Someone Can Love Them for Real
This is something I can’t blame members of the LGBTQ+ for. Throughout many years, their community has been subject to ridicule, harassment, disrespect, and mischief. They have been trialled under fire for a very long time and blamed for who they are. People who occasionally do show care and concern for them often turn out to be wolves in sheep’s clothing. They would embezzle, cheat, and rob people who identify as LGBTQ+ by pretending to be in-love with them at first. After they get their money, they just up and go leaving nothing but spite and hatred in the hearts of these innocent people.
So if a transgender is dubious of your motives and feelings, you cannot blame her. The fact that she is willing to talk with you and spend time with you are proof that she is convincing herself to try and take a chance. But with most of them having traumatic experiences with romantic relationships, you can expect them to let their guard down after a very, very long time. They’re not too quick to invest as they have been hurt far too many times. They might even regard you as a play thing as others have regarded them the same way before.
By not entertaining your words of love and by dismissing your advances as nothing but cheap tricks to make them fall for you, they protect themselves from getting hurt. If you’re really serious about pursuing a transgender woman, you may have to weather this storm for a long time.
Most (If Not All) Transgender Individuals Experience the Stress That Comes with The Sex Change & It Heavily Affects Their Behavior
A sex reassignment procedure is no joke. It is painful and excruciating; it can bombard the body with a lot of stress. After all, you are opposing your body’s biological nature. You are disturbing the peace of your internal organs and systems by injecting unnatural hormones in the bloodstream. This can put your body under a lot of stress and pressure and it’ll take a very, very long time before everything starts to settle down.
But trans people do it anyway. This simply tells us just how uncomfortable they are in their current state. They’re even willing to put up with pain, stress, and mood swings just to feel better in their own skin. If you’ve ever seen the movie “The Danish Girl” you’ll be able to witness just how painful a transgender woman’s struggle is – and yet they’re strong enough to struggle even harder. If you think you have the guts and the balls to date a woman like this, I salute your bravery and courage.
You are one true man, indeed.