Searching for that special someone is no easy task. In the digital age, apps that were meant to enhance our dating experiences are reducing meaningful communication. Forming an intimate bond and getting beyond the fleeting encounter seems to constantly be out of reach.
Once you find a potential partner, you might be on the lookout for signs that you are a good match. These are the four red flags that could mean your new relationship isn’t destined to last, and the four green flags that could mean an oval solitaire engagement ring is on the cards.
The Red Flags
1. They Don’t Talk About How They Feel
While there are many people that have a hard time talking about their emotions and feelings, you would imagine that they all have someone in their lives that they can be honest with and open up to. If you are not that person for them and you find them retreating into their shell and ignoring you when challenges arise, this could be indicative of emotional distance and a lack of compatibility.
2. You Justify Their Bad Behavior
If you find yourself making excuses for your new partner’s appalling behavior, you might need to ask yourself some difficult questions. Our mind is conditioned to dismiss evidence that doesn’t align with our preconceived beliefs. But if you are dismissing evidence that your new partner is toxic, it won’t bode well for the future.
3. Controlling Behavior
Controlling or manipulative behavior could put your new partner at odds with your social and familial life and ruin your existing relationships with friends and family. Controlling behavior isn’t a sign of love, it’s a sign of jealousy and insecurity and will only lead to problems.
4. All Interactions Are About Them
A relationship should be a partnership. If all of your interaction with your partner centers on them, this creates a power imbalance in the relationship that could soon manifest itself in other ways.
The Green Flags
1. You Feel Comfortable Being Yourself
It is tempting to only let your prospective partner only see the best side of you early in the relationship. This isn’t necessarily a cause for alarm but it isn’t the healthiest beginning to a relationship either. If you feel at ease around your new love interest and feel comfortable being yourself, warts and all, this is a promising sign that this person is the right one for you.
2. You Crave Each Other
At the beginning of the relationship, you should want to spend time with the other person. If feelings of boredom or dread are creeping in early in the relationship, this doesn’t bode well for a future life together when work, family and daily life starts getting in the way.
3. You Show Up For Each Other
You should want a partner that you can rely on to pick up the slack when you need help. This means setting those expectations from the beginning. This doesn’t mean unloading on your prospective partner on the second date, but it does mean getting them to do the things they say they will do. If they cancel plans at short notice, don’t call when they say they will, or constantly seem to be putting off seeing you, this is a huge red flag. Alternatively, someone who is always there when they say they will is showing you that they respect you and value your time.
4. You Celebrate Achievements Together
A relationship proves its metal in times of extreme hardship and extreme joy. Wanting to celebrate your accomplishments and achievements with your significant other, and their desire to celebrate achievements with you, is a major sign that your relationship has legs and could go the distance.